Six Months in Review

The first week that I started Wegovy, I saw a quote on Facebook.

"Dear Me in six months, I'm going to make you so proud."

At the time I wasn't sharing anything publicly about my new path -- only a few people knew what I was embarking on. But I shared the post, with a simple "If you know, you know."

Being proud of myself has been a difficult concept for me for most of my life. As a child, I was almost too proud. That turned a lot of folks off, so I did what a lot of little girls do and shrunk myself (at least metaphorically) so that others would be more comfortable. And as a result, I have become uncomfortable with being proud of myself.

An inventory of what has happened over the past six months might change that. As of press time, I've lost 48 pounds. I've dropped about two sizes (sizing, as I mentioned in my most recent previous post, is a jungle, so it's hard to tell for sure). I fought through my one big plateau where I didn't lose any weight for over two weeks. My feet are no longer plagued by inflammation. I've had the same bottle of Pepcid in my apartment for a number of months and need to open that bottle very infrequently. I don't need to adjust my seat belt in the car constantly anymore, and my stomach no longer touches the steering wheel. My bras fit correctly again. I can exist on my feet for much longer -- without pain -- than I could before, and I sweat a lot less. My singing voice is clearer and no longer filled with extra gasps for air. And I fit in chairs... with ARMS! And booths in restaurants!

If you've never been obese, a lot of these NSVs may not sound like big deals, and that's okay. If you have been obese, you can understand the joy of fitting in a chair with arms.

To add to the list of things that have changed, Anthony has lost 30 pounds since July 30! We've taken different approaches to our lifestyle changes, but being able to encourage each other along the way has been tremendous for both of us.

Of course, I have a long way to go to get to where I think I want to be. Weight loss has definitely slowed since I started Wegovy. I took a look back at my three-month review post and noticed that I lost 32 pounds at that time. That math comes out to me losing 16 pounds in the second half of the past six months, meaning that my weight loss has cut its pace in half in spite of being prescribed the highest dose of Wegovy. But I'm not exercising as much I was, thanks to scheduling conflicts and not currently having access to an indoor pool. I was swimming at least once a week in the summer months, and while I'm definitely not a summer person by nature, I miss swimming and its benefits. However, I recently learned through a Wegovy Facebook group that weight loss naturally slows once you've lost 10 percent of your body weight. I've lost more than that. In addition, I had that aforementioned big plateau in September. All things considered, I'm still on a good track.

My current short-term goal is to lose 50 pounds by December 5, when I need to travel by plane again -- and hopefully not need my seat belt extender on the plane. Those goals actually seem in reach. I also can't wait until bending over gets easier; it has already, but it's still far from easy to reach that bottom rack of the dishwasher. I still need to sit on the floor to sort my laundry, BUT... I no longer need to ask Anthony to help me stand up when I'm done. I'm not where I want to be, but I have concrete evidence that I have actually come a long way.

I get a lot of questions about side effects, and while I'm mostly saving those for a future Q&A post, I can give a brief synopsis here. I know that a lot of folks have digestive issues with GLP-1s (I see it on Wegovy Facebook groups pretty much daily) and I'm happy to say that in six months I've only vomited once. I can directly trace the incident to eating food that I shouldn't have eaten. That said, I keep adding foods to the "no-go" list. Rich, creamy sauces (i.e. Carbonara or Alfredo) do me no favors. Anything fried and greasy is out, and that sadly means pizzeria pizza because it's often swimming in grease (brick oven pizza is usually okay because it's not cooked with the same kind of grease levels). Puff pastry is on the list. And unfortunately, even sweet potato fries are off-limits, forget about regular fries. I want to make it clear that I did not purposefully restrict myself from eating those foods! I listened to my body, and my body said, "No way!"

But the biggest gift I've been given with Wegovy is a great deal of mental freedom. Six months ago, I had no clue just how much food was ruling my life. I am heading into a particularly busy and stressful season, and the urge to overeat is no longer present as it would have been in this type of season in the past. Or, what I should say is that my instinct is to overeat, but I don't actually want to do it. I still, sometimes, make portion sizes that I know I don't require anymore -- and I end up with a lot of leftovers or even throwing some food away. No, I don't love throwing food away. Yes, before you cancel me, it's a moral conflict for me. But we're working on understanding that I don't even need to prepare or order large portions anymore.

I hesitate to be proud of myself, because in the past, when I've "rested on my laurels" I fell off the metaphorical wagon. The moment that I became passive, I returned to my old ways. But that's not the only reason why I hesitate to be proud of myself. Some of that's really deep and personal and imbedded in my brain and surrounded by trauma, and I'm not going to bore everyone with that. Don't worry -- I bore my therapist with it regularly.

What I do know for sure is that six months is the longest period of time that I've ever consistently maintained a healthier lifestyle. A year ago, I never thought that I'd ever be able to fight the demon that plagued me for most of my life. I didn't realize that I was fighting the wrong demon. My body was never the enemy. Food was never the enemy. The enemy was the part of my brain that created food noise. Now that I'm fighting the correct demon, there is a path forward. While I haven't arrived at proud just yet, I know that I finally have mental freedom and quality of life that I've never experienced in my adult life. This holiday and birthday season, that's something to celebrate.