The Season of Stress

Not gonna lie.

Q1 of 2025 has been filled with a lot of stress for me, and for Anthony. I don't want to bore anyone with nitty-gritty details, but I also know I can't declare a stressful season without some kind of explanation. As an overview: we've dealt with some family members with medical issues, we both had Flu B the week before my first show of the year (I got better in time for the show!), my parents (who are both over 65 and at higher risk) both had COVID, work has been demanding for both of us, and Anthony had surgery -- which required him not only to stay in the hospital overnight and undergo a battery of pre-op tests, but also, to come off his GLP-1 for about two weeks prior.

Most notably: Gauri, my best friend since age 14, lost her beloved Dad -- a loss that shook the world for so many, us included. Lots of people love to talk about how people who have passed impacted others, but Subhash was a bonafide humanitarian who genuinely impacted every life he came in contact with. And while he was not my father, he was an instrumental part of my life from age 14 on -- and was kind to Anthony from the day that he arrived on the scene. Subhash was more than "my best friend's dad," and his memorial photo still sits on our coffee table more than two months after his passing.

We've dealt with tsunami of emotions surrounding all of these situations. And that's notwithstanding the current political climate.

So, what does this stressful season have to do with food noise, my relationship with food, and intentional weight loss? More than you may realize.

In the "before times," grief led me right to binge eating

My top priority is, of course, comforting Gauri throughout her grief. That's not to say that I am not still feeling my own grief after losing someone who was very important to my own life. I'm at a place now where I know, with certainty, that overeating isn't going to heal the hurt. Loud, overbearing food noise would have prohibited that thought clarity in the past.

My weight loss has stalled more than once, but I'm not panicking

On February 8th I weighed myself and I'd lost 60 pounds total. A week later, I gained three pounds back. I have yo-yoed back and forth with those three pounds over the past month and a half until this past week when I finally lost another pound to lose a total of... 61 pounds. But according to my amateur internet research, stress can signal the body to hold on to weight. Now that I know that Anthony underwent a successful surgery, I could swear that I felt my whole body relax. I really believe that more weight will come off as a result of a more relaxed state.

I didn't turn to stress eating to help cope with Anthony's surgery

Prior to Anthony's surgery, I checked in with my good friend (and food accountability buddy), Josh Mankiewicz of Dateline NBC fame... to talk about how anxious I was that I'd stress-eat my way through the process. We've discussed how easy it is to stress-eat when you're busy. Thanks to Wegovy, some reassurance both from Josh and from my therapist, and my newfound approach to my relationship with food, I didn't do it. Read that again... I didn't do it! In the past, any of these life situations would have been excuses for me to overeat or make food choices that I knew wouldn't be good for me. I ate when I was hungry, and I stopped eating when I was full. And I managed to drive past the Golden Arches without giving them a second thought, because I knew the agony of indigestion and nausea wouldn't be worth it. Notice how I didn't mention potential weight gain there; I still believe that "everything in moderation" is possible. I steer clear of fast food because it doesn't make me feel good anymore. In fact, it probably never made me feel good, but my food noise was so loud that I couldn't hear my body telling me that it didn't like fast food. Hence why... I ate it regardless.

I've leaned in to exercising

My schedule can be impossible sometimes and on certain days, I only have time for my aforementioned "Cube" exercise. But some exercise is better than no exercise at all. Since the weather has largely cooperated with my weather preferences of late, if I see a window of time during which I can go for a walk, I make sure I go. I feel like I've accomplished something of substance once I've walked for longer distances than I could only dream about during the "before times." And those walks are a great opportunity to catch up on my favorite true crime podcasts (Dateline mostly, of course), or listen to the radio broadcast of a Yankee game.

I have much higher hopes for the remainder of 2025, at least on a personal level (on a political level... that's a whole separate conversation). We have weddings, birthdays, Easter, and a few weekend trips to look forward to. Our good friend is running for mayor here in Glen Cove, and I can't wait to get to work volunteering for her campaign. Anthony's surgery was successful, and he's back on Ozempic having lost a total of over 50 pounds! I'm going to stick to my same philosophy of "everything in moderation," but try to have less of a focus on calorie counting and more of a focus on protein than I've had recently -- while continuing to lean into exercise before the weather is too warm for me to walk comfortably. And while we've lost someone dear to us, I know that Subhash would never, ever wish for me or anyone else to binge eat in his memory.

The season of stress proved difficult. But food noise would have only made an already stressful season... more stress-filled. The spring will be better, and big changes are coming, hopefully. For now, I am glad I can reflect on the fact that I handled the season differently than I would have previously, with the knowledge that stress-eating won't solve problems for anyone.

If you find yourself in the midst of a stressful season and food has always been your friend, please know that you are not alone, and it's not your fault. And know that I'm rooting for you.